As we will discuss in my new book, “This Is Marriage,” coming out soon, the prime key to building a healthy marriage is this–love is reciprocal! The husband loves and thus, the wife responds with respect and honor and so conversely–in the midst of their relationship with Christ as LORD! Christ and the church are the prime models for us in a lifelong commitment of monogamous marriage. Let’s explore some tried and true practical ways to make this happen.
Here are some simple tips from Scripture to put goodness in action by just watching how you use your attitude and words.
But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law. Galatians 5:22-23
- Always place Christ first and foremost in your life, and He will provide and guide (Matthew 6:33).
- Always focus on building your faith and maturity first (Matthew 7:3-5).
- Always pursue love even in toil as the mark of a true follower of Jesus Christ (1 Corinthians 13)!
- Always grasp on grace and how Christ loves you and your spouse, so you can give grace to them (Galatians 2:20-21)
- Always pray together daily (Psalm 127:1; Matthew 18:19).
- Always respect and love your spouse (Ephesians 5:1-2)!
- Always be encouraging, listening, supporting, accepting, trusting, and respecting with love (Ephesians 4:2).
- Always express your love to your spouse daily with a good attitude with, words, deeds, and kind touches (Solomon 8:6-7).
- Always forgive mistakes and practice forgiveness (Colossians 3:13).
- Never be arrogant, criticizing, threatening, nagging, blaming, complaining, punishing, or bribing (2 Timothy 2:22-24).
- Always laugh and have fun together (Proverbs 17:22).
- Always say “I’m sorry” (1 John 3:4-6).
- Always communicate goodness, ask, don’t second guess, thank, praise and listen (Romans 12:19)!
- Always put the needs of your spouse ahead of your own (Proverbs 17:9)
- Never trust your heart; you can only trust the Lord (Jeremiah 17:9)!
- Always be supportive of each other (Ephesians 4:2-3).
- Never seek to change your spouse, you can only change yourself (Romans 12:17-18).
- Always use words to build up your spouse, not tear him or her down. (Proverbs 25:11).
- Always have enjoyable talks every day (Proverbs 27:6).
- Never be defensive (Matthew 7:1-5).
- Always say “thank you” and “we” (Proverbs 10:12).
- Always go on dates, have fun together (Song of Solomon 7:11-12).
- Never absolutely never give egotism, sarcasm or cynicism (Proverbs 17:4).
- Never speak from anger (Ephesians 4:26).
- Never ever threaten the relationship (Mark 1:15).
- Always Give your spouse at least one compliment every day (Philippians 1:3-6).
- Never take your marriage for granted (Colossians 3:23).
- Always serve one another in love (Galatians 5:13).
- Never talk badly about your spouse to others (James 1:19).
- Always look for solutions, not problems (Proverbs 29:20).
- Always do all the important things together (Philippians 4:13).
- Always seek unbiased godly counsel (Psalm 37:30).
- Always discuss outside friendships (like work relationships), never harbor secrets (Galatians 5:13).
- Always agree to disagree, you will never agree on everything (1 John 3:18).
- Never try to control your spouse (Philippians 2:2).
- Never threaten splitting, leaving or divorce (1 Peter 1:22).
- Always, in all you do, seek and glorify the Lord (1 Chronicles 16:11).
Seek yourself, and you will be sad and lonely in so many ways! Seek Christ and you will be fulfilled and content! Remember that the heart of any healthy relationship is love and respect!
Upgrade your mindsets to goodness!